Stillmind Blog

You deserve to have friends. You deserve to have a family. You deserve to have a romantic relationship. You deserve to have a job you like that you’re good at. You deserve to have hobbies that bring you joy.     Continue reading…

Anxiety didn’t become a problem overnight, and it’s not going to be resolved overnight. It’s a process, and here’s where you can start.     Continue reading…

The things we worry about are important, uncertain, or unpleasant. If you find yourself worrying about things that are trivial, almost certain, or pleasant, you’ll want to take note.     Continue reading…

How do you cope when you feel out-of-this-world, anxious, and jumpy? How do you cope when there are people everywhere and you’re emotionally stretched and ready to snap? You don’t need to be delving deep into your feelings. At that moment, you need something powerful that works in an instant. I’ll bet that you’ve tried a breathing exercise. If it didn’t work for you, read this.     Continue reading…

Your anxiety is very real. Everything you feel is real. Everything that affects your thoughts and behavior is real. If it has a real effect on your life, how could it not be real? Some people feel like they shouldn’t experience anxiety. That’s nonsense. Everyone experiences anxiety to some degree. For some, it’s an apprehensive feeling when they go to the dentist or have an important meeting. For others, it’s much more severe. Either way, it’s real, and while it can be a real problem. It doesn’t mean you’re broken and it doesn’t mean you’re stuck.     Continue reading…

If you are feeling depressed, you will notice that you feel continually sad. You may also feel lonely, and when you think about the future you may feel hopeless or helpless. When people feel depressed they tend to think negatively about themselves (self-criticism), the world (hopelessness) and their future (helplessness).     Continue reading…

To change the behaviour, simply make as many changes as you can. Experiment with different changes until you find a strategy that works for you. Change as many antecedents as you can: change the environment, change what might be triggering the behaviour, change what people say or do or change the activity.     Continue reading…

To understand more about your thinking, rather than examining the thinking itself, have a look at when the thinking happens.     Continue reading…

Sometimes it’s useful to think about the accuracy of your thinking. Sometimes it’s not. Much of your thinking is simply not referential to your external world. Instead of considering the accuracy of the thought, a more useful question to ask is whether your thoughts are actually working for you.     Continue reading…

Your thoughts are the result of your creative and meaning-making brain. Your thoughts are the result of your problem-solving brain. But what do you think about your thinking?     Continue reading…

Love Maps keep you in touch with your partner and provide you with a bunch of ideas you can use to keep your relationship on track. You know what your partner likes, desires and dreams about — knowing these things helps you plan surprises, give gifts and provide timely support and encouragement.     Continue reading…

Learn how to use positive and negative reinforcement to change behavior in yourself and others.     Continue reading…

Anxiety can affect people in many different ways — you may feel frightened, uneasy, unhappy and sometimes even desperate.You are likely to feel anxiety in your body, and it will affect your thoughts, emotions and daily activities.     Continue reading…

Mindfulness practices help you be open to the experience of living — to be free of what your mind says and to experience peace, calm and relaxation.     Continue reading…

We find it almost impossible to stay in the ‘here and now.’ Our minds are continually rehashing the past and considering the future, while simultaneously reasoning through and evaluating options, ideas and experiences.     Continue reading…

That feeling that grabs you and stops you in your tracks. That feeling that leaves you feeling stunned or powerless. When that feeling is triggered inside of you, there is a way to work through it.     Continue reading…

Automatic thinking is a stream of thinking that is triggered by events or memories and ideas. It is often outside of your awareness, but you can easily bring it back into your awareness. Automatic thinking is predominantly negative, often constant and continuous, and can be thought of as ‘mind chatter.’     Continue reading…

Sometimes all you have to work with are the parts of you that have been around for a long time. These parts are the things inside of you that have gotten you through the tough times — the times when you thought you might not cope and the times when you struggled (even if others did not notice).     Continue reading…

We love the idea of flexible, agile bodies, but what about flexible, agile minds?     Continue reading…

The quickest way to get away from something you don’t want (e.g., anxiety) is to avoid or escape from it. After all, this is what your cat or dog does whenever it is afraid or scared. Avoiding things seems to work — you feel instant relief and your anxiety lessens. But if it works, why does the anxiety persist?     Continue reading…

Thinking styles happen when you habitually process information in a certain way. Thinking habits become ingrained and can stay below your conscious awareness, so starting to notice and ‘catch’ these thinking habits is the first step to making changes.     Continue reading…

Thoughts. What are they? What am I supposed to do with them? Which ones should I listen to? Which ones do I need to let go? Why do particular ones keep happening? Will I ever be free of them? Will they always hold me back?     Continue reading…

Here are some communication tips that will help you achieve a healthier relationship.     Continue reading…

Sometimes good things might be happening around you, but you may not feel happy. You might wonder if your brain will ever allow you to experience happiness.     Continue reading…

Relationships work when people feel safe, valued, appreciated and understood.     Continue reading…

People usually talk to me about situations and stressful events long after they are feeling overwhelmed or really unhappy about them. Long before they come for help, they have tried to work through issues, and often their attempts to manage things can work for weeks, months and even years.     Continue reading…

Partners who share what is happening to them with each other can create a strong emotional connection. Here's how to have an intimate conversation that holds emotional connection.     Continue reading…

One of the most destructive interactions that you can have in your relationship is criticism. Criticizing your partner leaves him/her feeling that there is something fundamentally wrong with who they are.     Continue reading…

Relationships work when you feel ‘safe’ and ‘connected’ to your partner. Connecting emotionally to your partner is a skill you can learn and practice.     Continue reading…

When you think that you need to be fixed/undo the damage/repair the broken bit/work on making changes to yourself, and working hard to do any of these things doesn’t seem to help.     Continue reading…

Understanding what you value in life and what is important to you can provide you with an underlying ‘guide,’ allowing you to make important decisions and move closer to a life that is meaningful and fulfilling for you.     Continue reading…